Just because you’re not seeing progress doesn’t mean it isn’t being made

Big goals, big decisions, big projects…big plans.

We itch to see progress — to know that our hard work is not wasted.
We become desperate for answers — to know that our brain’s churning is not in vain.
We are anxious to see results — for confirmation that we are on the right track and/or not making a huge mistake.

We get nervous if we can’t see progress or if we don’t feel we’re moving fast enough on a big decision.

So we pound on unlocked doors, not realizing that we will find our way through when we’re ready.

Worse yet, we start comparing our (lack of) progress to others’ success. We wonder why we don’t have their level of happiness, income, notoriety, success. Comparison is a losing game and it robs us of enjoying our own pace of progress or decision-making.

Just because you don’t see progress doesn’t mean it isn’t being made.

  • On big decisions: your gut collects dozens (if not thousands) of pieces of data every day. Just because you don’t FEEL closer to a decision doesn’t mean that it isn’t around the corner. One day you will wake up and you will KNOW. Although we often feel like those decisions happen overnight, we tend to overlook the invisible path that progress took to get us there. Decisions blossom when they are ready…not a minute sooner. Sometimes you just need to bite the bullet and decide, but sometimes you need to give yourself time and space. It’s a fine line. If you want help wrestling with a big decision, check out my decision-making template.
  • On big goals: With our biggest, hairiest goals it’s easy feel scattered, confused, stalled or overwhelmed. Not to mention the times that we’re just flat out LAID OUT at the bottom of an ugly, uncomfortable dip. Just because you haven’t crossed the finish line doesn’t mean that you aren’t getting closer every day. This applies to weight loss, healthy eating, starting a business, learning a new skill and anything else that requires perseverance and hard work.

It’s important to feel like we are headed in the right direction and to take meaningful action that moves us forward, but consider releasing the need to SEE progress at every turn.

Progress is often invisible to the naked eye. Imperceptible improvements start to accumulate right beneath our nose. Sometimes we’re so busy looking at the horizon that we miss the thousand flowers blooming. Stop for a moment and breathe…relax…and trust. You are farther along than you think.


Where in your life might you be making progress even though you can’t see (all of) it yet?
What progress have you already made that you haven’t yet acknowledged yourself for?

Big thanks to my dad, who inspired this post during one of our weekly walks.

***

P.S. Congrats to our contest winners from the Almost May Giveaway Day!

The winners are:

  • The Book of Awesome: Tiffany Mayfield
  • Business Cards: Sarah Peck, Emily Smith, Kerri Ford
  • Digital Camera: Kristen Byers

Winners – please send me an email when you get a chance — jenny [at] lifeaftercollege [dot] org. Thanks, and have a great week everyone!

P.P.S. Final reminder to join us on Thursday for the Book Launch Party (hosted by the kick-ass NY Creative Interns team) if you are in the area :)

 

28 comments

Categories: GoalsLife

  • http://parisianfeline.wordpress.com Tatiana

    I really, really liked this post. I find myself comparing my (lack of) progress to pretty much everyone I meet online or off. Especially since I’m a person who loves concrete results from my efforts, it’s especially difficult to understand that I might be making smaller, less tangible progress in other ways. But all of it is really important. I just… seriously need to keep that in mind.

    Thanks for this!

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Thanks Tatiana! It’s so hard not to fall into the comparison trap — especially when we do place a lot of importance on concrete results (as we should). All we can do is just keep reminding ourselves to go at our own pace!

  • http://profiles.google.com/nicole.gruen Nicole Gruen

    Once more I feel like I should go on walks with you dad.

    You heard it before and I say it again: This post comes at the perfect time! Building my business and following my dreams I grow sometimes impatient if I don’t see ‘progress’ within the time frame I invented.

    And then I remind myself of the spanish proverb: Pray to God, but hammer away. And in addition I read your awesome blog and know that one morning I will wake up and I’ll be there.

    Oh – and needless to say I made TONS of progress already.

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Thanks Nicole! I’m sure my dad will be very flattered by your comment :) So happy to hear that this post comes at the perfect time! And HUGE congrats on all of the progress you’ve already made — that’s amazing!

  • http://nifermusings.blogspot.com Jen

    Thank you, thank you, thank you Jenny Blake! I’ve been stressing out about my race training and my running workouts — feeling like I’m moving backwards and not forwards. It’s been discouraging. So a million thank you’s for reminding me that on the cellular level, I’m making progress; my body is getting stronger… in its own time. Thank you for reminding me that nothing worthwhile comes easy or quick, that it takes hard work and perseverance through the good days as well as the bad days.

    Thank you!

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Thank YOU, Jen! So happy to hear that this post served as a helpful reminder for you to celebrate how far you’ve already come, and to value the hard work even when you can’t immediately see the results. It’s definitely something I needed to hear too!

  • http://1lifeabundant.wordpress.com Samantha

    Aww Jenny, this post just speaks to me and where I am in my life right now. I just made a big decision to resign from my job—the path toward this decision was long and hard, but there came a moment where I said “I’m ready!” and I put my notice in a few hours later. It was exhilerating :) As for what I am doing next…well lets just say I’m getting anxious but I know it will be ok

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Samantha – I’m so glad! HUGE congrats on taking the big leap and resigning from your job — it sounds like you knew it was the right thing to do, even if it was a long road to get to that clarity. I’m so excited for you and this next phase! I have no doubt that you will be MORE than okay :) Making these tough decisions is hard, but they always pay off tenfold in the end!

  • http://www.daveursillo.com Dave Ursillo

    Jenny! This reminds me of the conversation we were having on Skype the other day. I’ve felt the same way as you lately, and found a nice bit of inspiration yesterday morning to give me a lift and realize the same thing that you describe here: “just because you don’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not being made.”

    Also, Danielle LaPorte’s last blog post on doubt is a really nice piece that gave me a sense of relief and determination.

    :)

    D

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Dave — YES!! Totally what we were talking about :) At some point we need to just take responsibility and take action (similar to your recent point), but it’s okay to relax and “receive” sometimes too :) Cheers!

  • http://twitter.com/MARLdblE Marlee Ward

    Hey Jenny!

    I love this post because I’m a total victim of the progress monster. I’ve learned not to engage in comparison (it only leads to self sabotage), but I’m wired for wanting instant results. Learning to have patience with myself and enjoy the PROCESS has been a big part of progress for me, and I think we can be happier overall once we figure that out!

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Hi Marlee! Thanks so much for your comment — I love that you refer to it as the “progress monster” — what a great name! Enjoying the process is so important — that’s 90% of the joy of pursuing a big goal (in my personal estimation :) . Have a great day!

  • http://www.byjanet.net/purple Purple Panda

    It’s tough to grow a blog, I think, especially if it’s still a baby! It’s also tough to grow a business. And to grow a blogging business… and being a professional blogger. I’m slowly getting there. Getting some recognition from people retweeting, one person writing a blog about me… Those are great!! But my traffic is still in beginning stages and I’m a newbie about doing it skillfully.. Patience in process. :)

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Purple Panda — yes, this is especially true with blogging! I think it’s amazing that you are working on building a blogging business — you’re absolutely right that it grows one reader, one post, one day at a time. Best of luck with everything! Thanks so much for taking time to leave a comment :)

  • http://twitter.com/patrissimo patrissimo

    Eh, I don’t find this helpful. The desire for progress is part of being human. We get dopamine rewards based on progress. The #1 thing about a job for happiness, according to an HBR study, is progress.

    So I would rather try to find ways to see progress, somehow, even in my long-term goals, than to just tell myself I am probably getting somewhere :) .

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Patri – thanks for your perspective — I think you make a great point. I would never advocate ignoring measurable progress altogether — but I do think there are cases where it’s happening even if you can’t see it. That said, I love your approach of finding more creative ways TO see it, otherwise what’s the point? And yes, that is much more informative and helpful than just telling ourselves we’re *probably* getting somewhere.

  • http://www.clareherbert.ie Clare Herbert

    Wow! Thanks for this. I needed to hear it. I’m very much a ‘set a goal, make vision board, make it happen, enjoy for 1 second, set another goal’ kinda girl & that’s not easy. Ever changing goal posts, ever expanding to do lists… My coach advised me to take the Start-Do-End-Rest model, and I have to actively do the ‘resting’ (which is ironic!)

    Everything is progress. Everyday is progress. I just gotta remember that. “The light is darkest just before the dawn” is one of my favourite quotes to keep focused when progress is invisible.

    I think it’s particularly a challenge for young 20-something, high-achievers. I often wonder. Will we ever be satisfied?

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Clare — thanks so much for your great comment! Love the Start-Do-End-Rest model that your coach shared — that’s great! I have a really hard time with the resting phase too — funny how that works. I agree that it’s a fine line between setting goals and achieving, and allowing ourselves to be satisfied exactly where we are. Have a great day!

  • http://getbusylivingblog.com Benny Hsu

    I definitely look for signs of progress and if I don’t see it, it does get frustrated. Especially since I see others where I want to be and I want to be there now.

    But I have to keep in mind to forget to look for the external signs and keep doing what I’m doing.

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Benny – thanks so much for stopping by! Sometimes external signs of progress are helpful, but I think more often it’s exactly what you said – just keep on doing what we’re doing and listen to our own gut/instincts.

  • http://kathrynsconversations.com Kathryn C

    Just on way to NY and picked up your book at LAX airport! You are doing an amazing job….. Love your “act as if” post….!

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Kathryn — that’s so cool — thanks for sharing!! Was it being sold AT the
      airport? If so, amazing!! I had no idea…

      And so glad you liked the “act as if” post — cheers! Have a blast in NY :)

      • http://kathrynsconversations.com Kathryn C

        Sorry, spacing out, picked it up at SFO (Live in LA, too much traveling lately :) ….. it was at the American terminal at the SFO airport….right out in front. Nice work! 

        • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

          Either way — that rocks!!! I had no idea it was in airports…that’s very
          fun news :) Thank you so much for buying a copy!! Means a lot to me :)

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  • Niclas1047

    “Sometimes we’re so busy looking at the horizon that we miss the thousand flowers blooming.”

    I’ve been reading your blog for a while now and I think that this little quote might be the best bit you’ve given!

    • http://www.lifeaftercollege.org jennyblake

      Aww, thank you so much Niclas!! Glad that line resonated with you :) Thanks
      so much for reading and for taking the time to comment!

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