Written by Jenny Blake

“Any other questions on your mind?” The doctor asked through a forced smile and subtly gritted teeth.

She must not have liked my ten minutes (just ten!) of health questions after I waited 45 minutes past my scheduled appointment time to see her.

The conversation, loosely approximated, went something like this:

“I’m trying to troubleshoot my breakouts, so I’ve eliminated sugar, gluten, dairy and alcohol from my diet. Can you help me test the nutrients in my bloodstream to make sure my levels are normal?”

“Okay I can run your testosterone levels.”

“Well, I…I’d like to know about all of my levels — iron, calcium, cholesterol — whatever is possible to test. I’m willing to pay extra.”

“If you’re eating leafy greens, you’re probably fine.”

“What I am trying to say is that, I’d like some precise data rather than making a wild guess or just assuming everything is okay.” **

**May the record state that I am not the one in the room who went to medical school! I am a woo woo yogi life coach and I have to convince you of my desire for data?!

She still looked skeptical. “You know, it could be the environment too. New York has a lot of pollutants in the air.”

“Listen, I’ve tried everything and nothing has worked. I am now paying very close attention to my food, and that IS working. But rather than just hoping or assuming my body is balanced and my hormone levels are normal, I would like to see some bloodwork.”

Sigh, “Ohhhh Kaayyyeeee, we can do that,” she said, almost as though she were appeasing a child by acknowledging an imaginary friend.

Are you kidding me?!

I report that I am exercising, meditating (to lower stress that shows up as cortisol), not drinking, not a smoker, and eating just about as clean as one can eat, and I have to make a case to get some basic facts about how those changes are reflected in my body?

I am a woman without wine, cappuccinos and chocolate (okay, still working on this one) — do you think I would give those up if I weren’t serious?!?!

We move on to the exam portion of the appointment.

“Have you seen a dermatologist? They can prescribe {long complicated name}.”

“Yes, I’ve seen dermatologists for the last 15 years actually.” And in fact, not one has ever asked me what I was eating.

I explained to her that I have tried every cream, pill and antibiotic, and beyond studies showing that many have harmful long-term affects, they weren’t working.

At the peak of my frustration, I figured maybe my body is trying to tell me something.

So instead of shutting it up with pills and prescriptions, I decided to listen and experiment and understand if I am doing something to enable the reaction (breakouts) I’m trying to avoid.

I started reading countless books, blogs and studies on how closely correlated diet is with acne. I gobbled up every bit of research and naturopathic remedy I could find. I now know that, in addition to stress and hormones, dairy, sugar, gluten and caffeine have all been known to aggravate (if not outright cause) acne.

Bottom line 1: Knowledge is power.
Bottom line 2: I will be switching doctors.

This whole experience was not all that abnormal. To the non-informed patient it was just like any other 20-minute annual exam. But to a frustrated and increasingly more educated one in the areas of health and nutrition, it was a wake-up call.

Sure, I could pay for a third-party to conduct all these standard tests for me, but should I have to? If the doctor was already drawing my blood for a routine exam, wouldn’t it make sense to tack on a few other nice-to-know benchmarks?

You just earned a new CEO title (and the responsibility that follows)

This experience was an important reminder that we need to learn to be our own health advocates. I say learn because this IS a skill. It is not something we are taught, and medical care can be quite intimidating and overwhelming . . . and I’m not even dealing with the big stuff.

You’ve heard me talk about how no one will hand you your career on a silver platter. Well, it takes the same dedication, work, research, eating/exercise experiments, and awareness to be the CEO of your own health and medical care.

There is no doubt that the practitioners you choose to see are important, as are regular check-ups, but they are nowhere near everything.

I’d love to hear from you in the comments: Have any of you had a similar experience? How do you approach the “CEO of your own health” mentality (if at all)?

Written by Melissa Anzman

Genius comes in every age – and I’m guessing that you are one of the smart ones at work. Being one of the smartest employees in the room, and also one of the youngest, can be a frustrating conundrum. You know you have value to add in the conversation, you are qualified to take on a challenge, but your perceived age is stopping others from taking you seriously.

That stops now.

Push Past Your Age and Be Taken Seriously at Work

1. Do your job really, really well.

This probably goes without saying, but unless you are delivering what they are asking at a very high level, nothing you do will change their perception about needing “more time in the job” or maturing. Deliver consistently, exceed expectations at every opportunity you get, and be reliable.

2. Stop telling people how old/young you are.

This is good advice for everyone, but there is a reason that age is a protected class. No one except for HR (and maybe your direct manager), should know how old you are. So stop going around and telling people that you’re only {enter a number in your 20s}.

If you don’t bring your age up, it’s a non-conversation. So while your accomplishments are amazing for your age, toot that horn outside of work with your friends and family… not to your coworkers.

3. Step away from any and all conversations about age.

I am always surprised when the question comes up during a meeting, but when there is one person in the room who looks young, someone always wants to figure out just how young that person is. If you are asked directly, “How old are you?” do not answer. For the love of Nancy.

Hedge around the question by changing the topic or making a self-deprecating remark such as, “I know Bob, I look young, but really, we’re both here to do a job. Come on buddy!” Regardless of the situation or fear of being “rude,” just don’t answer it. Once you respond, it will get around and you will find you will not be able to outrun your age from anyone!

4. Pop-culture references.

Lack of pop-culture knowledge is what usually “outs” people as being young. And it is also the thing that makes your older peers feel ridiculously old. What am I talking about? For example, when someone throws out a Def Leopard reference, or refers back to Spaceballs… you respond with a “what is that?” comment.

Please, don’t do that anymore. It’s extremely upsetting for the person on the other side of that question. Trust me – this is the number one “annoyance” that has been pointed out to me by managers, as being a “target” for immaturity. It’s not right, but it’s how it is.

Instead, either brush up on some 1980s and 1990s pop-culture trivia or simply be a part of the conversation instead of asking for clarification. Some resources to help you gain this knowledge: watch a lot of Pop-Up Video, Google pop culture trivia and start learning, or watch a ton of “cult classic” movies from the 1980s and 1990s.

5. Your outward appearance should match your peers’.

Appearance is everything, so make sure that your outside presentation matches that of your peers’. I’m not saying don’t be trendy, cute or styled; but instead, make sure that you are dressing the part. For example, if your female peers do not wear jeans to work – guess what, you shouldn’t either. Even if you style it amazing. If your male peers are not wearing sandals, you can’t either. See the difference?

You don’t have to be dull or blend in with your appearance, but you do need to keep the same standards that they have. Thus, eliminating the appropriateness conversation and instead shifting the discussion to one of style.

6. Be confident when you contribute, but speak up wisely.

You should absolutely contribute and speak up during group meetings and discussions. But remember that every time that you do, people will be listening – so do so wisely.

A common complaint about Gen Y’ers (hello – big generalization coming), is that they “think they know it all.” Totally NOT the case, but to help differentiate yourself from this stereotype, when you do speak-up, try and do it with care, finesse and value-add. Stand firm in your delivery, but also be engaging and inclusive with your remarks.

Make your contribution feel as though it’s from the whole team.

7. Stop referring to, “in school we did…”

Bad news here people, but school is nothing like the real working world. You have probably figured that out by now. So stop referring to all of the fabulous things that you did in school that you expect to work or resonate at work.

First, it makes your colleagues feel old – I mean, if you are still referring to school, you are giving away your age. Second, it negates all of the lessons you have learned and applied in the “real world.”

These references can creep up and maybe even deliver a good idea or two from time to time. Don’t stop using these learnings, but start positioning them differently. Present the idea without the introduction – and you’ll be awesome.

 

We’d love to hear from you below in the comments: What have you done that has helped you stand out at work, without your age being an issue?


melissa anzman

About Melissa

Melissa Anzman is the creator of Loosen Your White Collar where she helps people get clarity, get ahead, and love their job. She is the author of two books: How to Land a Job and Stop Hating Your Job. Follow her @MellyMelAnz.

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